here i am

sitting in my hotel room at the Days Inn in Shrewsbury, Mass, a town that was incorporated beFORE the 13 colonies declared Independence. Ya, *that* old.

my dad is across the hall, in room 133, catching up with old Rhode Island-day friends Nalin Uncle, Prafulla Aunti, Kirit Uncle, and Rashmi Aunti, Gupta Uncle, and others

It's funny. I am getting a glimpse of some of their past (theirs and my parents') that I hardly could have known about, since we left Rhode Island by the time I was seven... It's er... Illuminating to say the least.

mixed messages

wow.

wow.

wow.

sometimes

i get so so so so SO angry.

right now is one of those times.

I was researching fellowships online.

I found one for "new Americans" - people who are naturalized citizens.

Got excited about it, but then.

Found out they have an AGE REQUIREMENT. You cannot be older than 30 To Even Be Considered.

What kind of Bullshit is this?

Academia is a Stacked deck. They prefer to have callow, impressionable youths straight from the grocery stores - er, colleges - delivered to their doorstep.

I despair.

yesterday

yesterday i wrote a poem while waiting for the subway
not super original, but something at least, vs. nothing…

New York is
pizza and smoke
burnt peanuts
and piss
whoosh and roar of underground labyrinth too dark to tell
push and run
glare and glamour and sleaze and
honking of impatient yellow taxis
workaday wonder
outrageous ordinariness
home

May 12, 12:42PM